One of the first things they tell you not to do when you are trying to control your manic-depressive cycling is NOT to try and extend your Mania. For instance, when you start to feel euphoric, best not to go to that big party with all the amazing drugs, and exuberant people -- this is not the actual example from my life, but nonetheless I did try to hold onto my euphoria last night. I discovered today, the very hard way, that this was not a good idea. As this morning I fainted at the bus stop.
Very embarrassing. I was feeling too good. My heart started to race, my vision started buzzing and beaming a sort of silvery colour and then I lost all circulation and ended up flat on my bum in a mud puddle (yes, it was raining), and that, only after bumping into three people -- one of which was wearing a white shirt and I believe before blacking out I might have left a make-up stain on his shirt.
*sigh* I really am trying to control this, I have to try harder. I was so pumped about all I've been doing for my business this morning, but for some reason I am starting to see I will have to try harder to take care of myself to take care of the business.
(!) did you get any help after you blacked out?
ReplyDeleteprops on the revelation in the last line.